The following article appeared in the September 15, 2025, edition of The Charlotte Ledger, an e-newsletter with smart and original local news for Charlotte. We offer free and paid subscription plans. More info here.
5 days after Iryna Zarutska’s killing, friends and family gathered outside of the public glare to remember her, with art, music and memories; ‘Paint something, kiss a flower … she would want that'
by Tony Mecia
You could see the blond hair poking up from inside the open white casket. The young woman’s artwork displayed on easels. The family and close friends in the front row, talking quietly.
A slideshow played on a screen near the casket, with photos of her goofing around with friends, taking selfies, playing with a dog, painting.
Then, the music started: a song in Russian, by the Ukrainian boy band The Quest Pistols, called Ты так красива, or “Ty Tak Krasiva.” That translates to “You Are So Beautiful.” It was one of her favorite songs.
It was a quiet Wednesday afternoon in a small funeral home behind a shopping center in Huntersville. There were no banks of TV cameras, no politicians or dignitaries, no attention to it on social media or the national news.
Just a few dozen people at James Funeral Home, doing what you do at a funeral: signing the guestbook, sitting solemnly and listening to loved ones remember the deceased — in this case, Iryna Zarutska, a 23-year old who had emigrated from Ukraine with family members to escape the violence there.
The service was held on Aug. 27, five days after her death, and at the time, information was just starting to emerge about what had happened on that Blue Line light rail train. The funeral was publicly advertised. I sat in, to learn more about the short life of the young woman whose name wasn’t yet nationally known.
“We have gathered ourselves together today to celebrate the life, to mourn the death and honor the memory of Iryna,” began John Hill, the funeral director. “She passed from this life into eternity just this past Friday, on August the 22nd. No one here expected to be here today. This is tragic and most difficult, to say the least.”
He highlighted Iryna’s hardships as a Ukrainian immigrant and her ability to find happiness despite challenges. And, perhaps from conversations with her loved ones, he recalled her smile most of all.
“She loved having a good time,” he said. “She smiled. As a matter of fact, her smile was infectious, and it was contagious. Anytime she smiled, she lit up the room. Anytime she smiled, she got the attention of everybody.”
The service was live-streamed. Iryna’s father, Stanislav, watched from Ukraine.
There were two other speakers. Iryna’s sister, Lerka, praised Iryna’s boyfriend, Stas, briefly in English before switching to Ukrainian.
“I just don’t know the words to tell you my gratitude for making her happy,” she told him in Ukrainian, according to a later translation. “... You are part of our family forever.”
She urged people to love each other — and to be sure to tell those you love that you love them: “It is very important to tell a person once more.”
Reflecting on her sister’s death, she said: “Something was torn out of me, something that will never return, something very precious and great. That’s all. Thank you for coming. Thank you for supporting us.”
Iryna’s cousin, Vera Falkner, rose to thank Iryna “for the late-night conversations, every laugh, every cry.” She said, “Grief will look like a random Tuesday night, when a stranger passes by wearing your favorite perfume. Grief will look like listening to your favorite music without you. Grief will find you in conversations or the shower or while you sit in traffic or attending an art exhibition.”
At the end of her remarks, she paused, then added: “And please, she would hate this. She would want you to dance or listen to music, smoke a cigarette — do something. Paint something. Kiss a flower. This dance of life is so fragile,” she said, slowing down the words. “And she is way too young for this. And you all know it. We all know it. Do something with your life. She would want that.”
Hill pointed out that the name Iryna means “peace.” Her life was taken too soon, he said, but she made the most of her 23 years.
“She took the hardships and the struggles of the life that she had, and instead of being down and out, she overcame them,” he said. “She experienced joy. She experienced happiness. She still had a smile, and she’d want you to have that tonight.”
In the weeks since her death, much of the public focus has centered on the violence of Iryna’s final moments, and on questions of safety and accountability. The man charged in her random stabbing, DeCarlos Brown Jr., has a long criminal history and had been diagnosed with mental illness.
But in that small room in Huntersville, the focus was on something else. It was on Iryna’s laughter, her artwork, her smile that could brighten a room.
As the service concluded, those in attendance were asked to place flowers beside her in her casket. They were symbols of grief — but also reminders of a young life full of beauty.
Tony Mecia is the executive editor of The Charlotte Ledger. Reach him at [email protected]
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