Ways of Life: A runner known for his creativity and compassion

Also remembered: A woman active in local Democratic politics; a longtime geriatric nurse; an executive at a Pepsi bottling plant; a textile worker whose real love was fishing

You’re reading Ways of Life, a weekly obituaries newsletter from The Charlotte Ledger honoring our friends, neighbors and family members who made an impact on Charlotte through the ways they lived their lives.

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Besides running, Lance Sotelo’s other passion was crocheting. He was known in the LGBTQ+ community for his creativity.

Lance Sotelo finished fifth in his first marathon, the Novant Health Charlotte Marathon, on Nov. 15. (Photos courtesy of Jeanne Sotelo)

by Kay West

When Lance Andreas Jesus Sotelo left the small town of Dalton, Ga., to attend Queens University in August 2019, his father, Jesus “Chuy” Sotelo, struggled to let go of his only son — the baby of the family, just shy of 19.

“When he first got there, we talked every day, and I went to see him every weekend,” Chuy said. “Finally, Jeanne (his wife) told me Lance was worried about me, that I didn’t want to let him go. He was right.”

Chuy and Jeanne fretted that the move from Lance’s familiar Dalton bubble to big city Charlotte was too big a leap for him. And while they had unconditionally accepted and supported Lance’s proud homosexuality since he came out when he was just 15, they were always cognizant that he could be hurt by others who did not feel the same.

“He told his sisters Gabby and Emily first and then his mother, and I finally just asked him if he was gay. He looked nervous but said yes,” Chuy said. “I hugged him tight and told him I was proud of him, that I loved him and to be careful.”

Lance’s promising future would be denied when he was out on a run — the sport that had been his ticket to Queens University — and was killed by a car that ran a red light on Jan. 14 at East 36th Street and The Plaza. The hit-and-run driver turned herself in the next day. Lance was 25.